20 March 2013

20Mar2013

It worked on me, I bought like 20 pairs of underwear and put them on my pet echidna.

Hinch. Don’t ask.
20Mar2013

OK, so I'll make ONE exception to my "no bot conversations" rule…

Carlfish:

hogger: Are you complicated?

hogger:

Not really. Are you complicated?

Carlfish:

That depends on who you ask, I guess.

hogger:

Will computers take over the world?

Carlfish:

Not until they become something totally different to today’s computers.

hogger:

I agree. Do you want to have an affair with me?

Carlfish:

I don’t think we’re compatible.

hogger:

I think we are. What makes you think we’re not?

Carlfish:

You’re an IRC robot, I’m a fish.

hogger:

Robot.

Carlfish:

Fish.

hogger:

Okay, I like fish.

Carlfish:

I’m sorry, I still won’t have an affair with you.

hogger:

I’ll be back (Terminator Reference).

Carlfish:

Now I’m a little creeped out.

hogger:

Good.

20Mar2013

There was movement on the channel, for the word had passed around…

Jirra:

I wish the shield display thing on the health bars went backwards from current health, not forwards from current health

Jirra:

Most of the time I’m at full health and can’t see anything about how much damage I can absorb

Wobin:

Oh, you don’t see the overflow?

Jirra:

“And I somehow rather fe-ar that I’d hate to change with Jirra / Hate to take a turn at testing where the stories come and go…”

Wobin:

“While she faced the code eternal of CRM infernal / But I doubt she’d suit the writing, Jirra of the Overflow.”

20Mar2013

How many Atlassians does it take to empty a fridge?

Swoon:

I think it’s pretty reasonable to expect that someone needs to be regularly on fridge-cleaning duty.

hinch:

Then we should assign different teams to do it so that it doesn’t just have to be the experience team.

Jirra:

QA: “There are three rotting food items in the fridge. Please fix.”

hinch:

Support: “The things rotting in the fridge have now come to life and are destroying a Japanese coastal town”

hinch:

Dev: “Closed, won’t fix”

Jirra:

Support: “Please provide logs of all items inserted into and removed from the fridge for the past 3 years. Then reindex your fridge and see if it’s fixed.”

Jirra:

Architect: “We should talk to the owners of all the other fridges and see if we can solve this bad-food problem consistently”

Carlfish:

Founder: If we just throw out 80% of the bad food, the fridge should smell just good enough that we can keep going.

Jirra:

Tech Writers: “OK, the fridge has rotten food in it. Let’s call that out in the fridge release notes”

Jirra:

IT: “The fridge isn’t an IT-managed service, we’re not responsible for it”

Carlfish:

ANB: “Where is your fridge going?”

20Mar2013

What did the lolzcat run into when he went to Gdansk?

Jirra, who never meta-joke she didn’t like.
20Mar2013
Jirra:

Why are all our user personae really smart, switched-on, hard-working people? Where is Lisa the Lazy? Ivan the Incompetent? Uma the Unmotivated?

Carlfish:

Barry the Must Exhaust his Budget?

Jirra:

Sally-Lou the Sharepoint Lover

Carlfish:

Garry the Will-Buy-Anything-Garter-Says

Jirra:

Ian the IE6 User

Carlfish:

Maurice the Malicious

nathan-022:

Uter Frzysncki the Unintelligible Foreigner

Carlfish:

Uther Pendragon, the wondering why he is in the year 2013.

Jirra:

Is he a JIRA or Connie user?

20Mar2013
* lolzcatmob

is stuck in a lift.

Later…

jedi:

What happened in the lift?

lolzcat:

The mechanic managed to get the door open. I shoved him inside, closed the door and ran off laughing.

Jirra:

Turns out that if you’re overgeared, you don’t have to worry about the mechanics of the elevator boss fight.