10 June 2010

“New in Universe 1.1: massive sinks that consume all matter.”

I can imagine Steve Jobs introducing that at the developer conference.

“Now this is something you're going to love. Remember last year when I introduced gravity? Well that got our brilliant engineers thinking what else you could do with it…”

“Well today I am proud to introduce… iSingularity.”

That could equally be a Google presentation.

“We at Google have decided to release Gravity to the wider world. We've made it Open Source, cause we're nice like that”

Good thing the Universe wasn't made by Blizzard, it would shut down every Tuesday.

The universe has bugs. You think black holes are a feature?

*I* think black holes are a feature.

“New in Universe 1.1: massive sinks that consume all matter.”

They're fricking awesome!

The whole nature of light has the feeling of a piece of code that started off with one idea and then a bunch of people hacked it.

private const String SPEED_OF_LIGHT = "2.9 x 10^8 ms/s" // HACK: DO NOT CHANGE THIS VALUE; EVERYTHING BREAKS.

ffs do they pressurise these yoghurts? i just opened it and it exploded all over my lap

i don’t think you should eat it

i already ate it

even the bits on my lap

apart from the fact that it’s all over your pants, exploding yoghurt usually means it’s gone off

oh there is some on my keyboard.. win!

vdfgbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbb

what ?

It’d be cool if you could cast [Polymorph] on yourself.

“Hey, I came up here to talk to Charles…” “Where is he, and why is there a sheep at his desk?”

Not to be attempted in New Zealand, for obvious reasons.

“Hey, I came up here to talk to Charles…” “Where is he, and why… hello there…”

How do I check what gender I am?

look in your pants?

I’m not wearing any.

Technically, it should be self evident then